Darndest Things - Jesus Edition

I'm not sure if its the season or what, but Ryan has been bringing up Jesus in the most spontaneous conversations lately.

We were driving into town, and a big storm was passing.  I saw a bolt of lightning crack across the sky in front of us and out of surprise and awe said "WOW!  I just saw lightning!".  Now, Ryan has always been rather sensitive to loud noises.  I'm not entirely sure if they hurt his ears, or if he just doesn't like the feeling of being surprised...but he REALLY doesn't like loud noises.  When I mentioned the lightning, he became very nervous about the forthcoming thunder and started asking questions with a very concerned tone.  One of his questions (quickly followed by a statement) was "Is it going to do it again?  I don't want it to do that again!"  I told him that I could not answer that as I don't have control over it.  He said "Ohh yeah.... God makes the weather."  I replied that yes, he is the one who gives us whatever weather we need.  Immediately Ryan came back with, "Well,  maybe I could ask Jesus to tell God to stop doing that".
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The boys were at Grammie's house and Papa was home for lunch.  They have a little thing they do that is based on a popular children's book....Grammie says "Do you know how much I love you?"  Ryan answers "To the moon and back".  This particular day, they continued with a few more of these and then Ryan piped up with a big grin.."Hey Papa...I love you to Mars and clear past where Jesus lives!"
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For this one, you need to know who Tanner was.  Tanner was Gage's folks' awesome dog.  Tanner was a big part of this family and blessed us with his presence until earlier this year.  My boys love dogs, and Tanner was a big part of that... especially since they spent a considerable amount of time at their house twice a week while I work.  We all dearly miss him!!

Ryan and I were discussing the Christmas cookies we were going to make (he was VERY excited about making and decorating Christmas cookies this year!).  Ryan asked who all we were going to give some to.  I listed off a few people and Ryan thought for a minute.  His face started to beam with pure joy, then he shared his idea with hope ringing in his words..."Maybe we could give one to Jesus so he can send it to Tanner."
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This last one brought tears to my eyes.  I am continuously in awe of what kids DO remember (we all hear about "oh...they're young...they won't remember that), what the DO know and understand, and of their HUGE capacity to love without strings, without boundaries, and without a complete understanding of the complexities of it.  They just simply love...with complete faith.

May your Christmas preparations slow down enough for you to enjoy the love and faith that is so abundant!

"Truly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it."
Luke 18:17 & Mark 10:15

Darndest Things - Christmas Edition

The boys and I decided to be brave and were doing a little shopping at Costco.  For those who haven't been to a Costco, it is a very large warehouse-style store with displayed merchandise surrounded by towering stacks of product (I think its kinda like a Sam's Club??).

I was looking at some Christmas decorations and the glistening diamonds in the brightly lit jewelry case across the aisle caught Ryan's eye.  He "wow"-ed at the shiny rocks and excitedly called for me with a "MOM!!  LOOK!!!".  I turned around and faced him...he lovingly looked me in the eye and said "MOM...maybe I'll buy you a ring for Christmas...."  I felt my heart melt and a smile start to come across my face when he finished his thought with a heartfelt sincerity and a bit too much enthusiasm "...then you and dad can get MARRIED!!!"

I think the look of shock set those standing around us straight...or it could be the fact that I quickly reminded him that daddy and I already WERE married.

A Beachy Thanksgiving

This year we decided to head to the beach for the long Thanksgiving weekend with Gage's folks and his sister & brother-in-law.  Earlier in the week, wintery weather conditions threatened to make any trip a challenge, but we forged ahead...taking some comfort in the fact that we have 4-wheel drive and studded tires.  We headed west Wednesday morning, and with no new precipitation having fallen in the past 24 hours, made the trip with only a few nervous moments (roads had been pretty much cleared, but there were definitely some tricky spots going over the coastal mountain passes).

Thanksgiving morning was spent with us ladies primarily doing some preparations in the kitchen for the feast...but we did get out of the house for a while to enjoy the cold yet clear and beautiful day on the beach (see Hymas Photos for pics of the day).  We always have a great time at the beach...the boys love having the big open space to just play and explore.  There are also countless rocks that need to be thrown back to the waves...endless fun for an almost 3 year old.  We were even visited by a curious sea lion who was playing in the surf (and perhaps feeding??) where a small tributary named the "D" River  enters the great Pacific.

 For me, this was a great place to just be in the moment, breathing in the cool, salty ocean air and watching my healthy and happy boys at play, feeling my heart fill to the point I thought it might burst.  I am thankful each and every day for all the blessings in my life, but 3 of the most important are all my boys, and watching them laugh and play and enjoy life is one of the greatest gifts I could ever receive.

We returned to the beach house, finished up the last preparations, and enjoyed a wonderful meal together.

Over the course of the next few days (which flew by much too quickly), we played games, visited the Oregon Coast Aquarium, did a little shopping, and just enjoyed being in the company of family.

Ratatat Breakdown

Well as most people that know me know I like a wide variety of music (this is Gage by the way).  I happened to stumble onto these guys Ratatat while watching Diggnation (one of my favorite weekly web vids).  Anyway, Ratatat is kind of electronica meets rock etc.  Lots of funky bass lines and synthesizers etc.  Ryan and Evan took about 5 seconds to start expressing themselves by laying down there own funky dance moves.  Check it out, Andi and I sure had a good laugh. 

The Empty Chair

As she entered the room...my chest twisted into a knot and my stomach tensed.  She gave me a quick greeting as she sat in the chair across form me.  I recounted the "episodes" in the hopes that we would be given an answer.  After I explained, she delivered the news...he has a "seizure disorder".  My stomach tensed as did my grip on my little boy who was snuggled on my lap.  She tenderly explained what we needed to do, and that he would need to be medicated...a word I never associated with either of my beloved boys.  After our conversation, she gave me some brief words of encouragement, and left the room.

My mind was reeling with questions that could not be answered...how could my healthy, happy, active boy be "wired differently"??  How is it that just a few weeks ago, the only diagnosis he had was "2-year old"?  For the longest time, I just looked at him...his blue eyes, vibrant and full of life; his blonde hair, with the curly cowlick in the front; his lively smile with a hint of mischievousness.  I then looked up at the empty chair where moments before the doctor had sat.  Tears began to spill down my cheeks.  It all felt so unfair...she had left, returning to her life, and our lives will never be the same.  At that moment, I despised that empty chair.
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Some of you already know...but for those who don't...Evan has been diagnosed as having a relatively uncommon seizure disorder.  Nonconvulsive Status Epilepticus (NCSE).  He has had 3 "episodes" over the last 2 months where he would stare off into nothingness and become completely unresponsive for 20 minutes or more.  After his second episode, we started the process of getting him in to see a pediatric neurologist (which included getting an EEG & MRI).  Evan's system expedited that process when he had this last (third) episode just this past Thursday.  We went to the ER and were admitted.  While there, they were able to get his EEG, and we were able to see the pediatric neurologist.  His EEG showed some abnormalities, which helped her to determine that the NCSE seizures were "complex focal", meaning they did not involve the whole brain, but just a portion of it.

Apparently over 50% of kids who have seizures in childhood outgrow them by their mid to late teens.  We are VERY hopeful that Evan will be one of those kids.  Evan has been started on Tegretol (Oxycarbamazapine).  The plan is that when he is 2-years, seizure-free...they will do another EEG and we can consider trying to take him off the medications.  If he goes 1 year, non-medicated and seizure-free, it is highly likely he has outgrown them and will not have any more seizures.

This has been a very scary road, but we are thankful that we have some answers, and thankful that it is not something potentially much worse.  Because he is a healthy guy, and doesn't have significant developmental delays, the neurologists (as well as us) are very hopeful that he will be among those who outgrow their seizures.

While in the hospital, Evan was a super trooper!  Despite typical "hospital sleep" where he was disturbed every 3-4 hours, and despite the IV and covering on his one hand, he was still the lively and active Evan that we know and love.  He even did a little dancing on the last day in the hospital (you can see the video as well as a few Evan pics in the "Hymas Photos" section).

If you have any questions about any of this, you can feel free to email me or give me a call.

Darnedest Things #2

In my last posting... I forgot about another funny thing Ryan has said lately.

On every other Wed., the kindergarteners are in school for almost 5 hours (compared to their usual day of just under 3).  This is the longest Ry has ever been in school before, and I think by lunch time he had had it!  Ryan went home with a friend after school as I had to work that day, and when I called him, he excitedly told me about his day and threw in "OH...and I cried!".  I asked if he had gotten hurt or if he was just sad.... he responded (still excitedly with a hint of astonishment) with "I don't know!  Water just started coming out of my eyes!!"  I repeated my question, and he repeated his answer.  Apparently it had just been a long day, and he was ready to go home.  He is still very excited about school and loves going (thankfully).

Kids Say the Darnedest Things

Ryan has been full of these lately.

Thing#1:
Ryan and Evan are playing (rough).  Evan jumped up and clung to Ryan like a bear cub clings to a tree.  Ryan supported him for about 10 seconds before toppling down to the carpet, Evan still clinging to him.  Ryan popped up...and said.... "MOM...Did you see that?!?!  I carried Evan!  Now you don't need a babysitter....I can babysit Evan!!!"

Thing #2:
When we come home from a camping trip, Ryan likes to "help" me pull the car forward after detaching the tent-trailer.  This usually entails us moving the car forward about 2 feet.  One day (the day after returning from such a trip), we were getting in the car and Ryan said.... "Mom, can I drive to the store?"  I look at him with an "are you crazy" face and say "Uh...no".  "But MOoooOM...you let me drive yesterday!!"  I had to inform him that helping to pull the car forward in the driveway does not qualify him to drive on the road.

Thing #3:
Ryan had 2 frogs that had gone from tadpole to frog in a little habitat we had in our house.  One of the frogs died very shortly after becoming a frog.  About 2 weeks later, the other frog died.  I told Ryan and he asked me  (with a bit of saddness in his voice) "Why did he die??"  I scrambled in my head to find the right words... all I could come up with was "Honey... I don't know.  We did everything we could...we fed him, made sure his home was clean...I just don't know".  Ryan looked at me and I saw enlightenment run across his face as he said.... "I know why he died!"  I thought uh oh...this could be interesting....and hesitantly muttered "why is that?"  "Because Jesus told him it was his time!"  Pure clarity.  I couldn't have said it better.

Thing #4:
We were riding home in the car (Ryan and Evan in the back, I was driving).  Evan was asking repeatedly for gum.  I had told him no...and was ignoring the barrage of further requests.  Ryan turns to Evan and says "Evan...what mom says, I say.  Mom says no, then I say no.  I'm older than you....I'm older, like a big person! So, NO gum!"

I'll continue to post these as they come up....so be looking for more in the future!!